Kick in the guts
 

Well something told be his Dr. free life couldn't last forever. My father hasn't been to a Dr. in over 50 years, I mean he got sick, but never in my 53 years of knowing him has he missed more than three days of work.
Four weeks ago he was home more than working, we figured he got a bug, and at 76, this one is kicking his butt. Well one week let to two weeks, now he's complaining of pain in his side and his backside. (bum)
Well he thinks it's roids, and me, I was like father, the pain your describing doesn't sound like roids to me, maybe you should go in. (Father) for what, it'll go away...
Okay, he hasn't eaten in two weeks, just barely nibble at supper time, sleep anytime, and miss work. HE'S SICK. So finally a week ago last Monday he asked Nancy to take him into the ER. That's a red flag to us.
They run a bunch of tests, come to find a lump on his liver, and that usually means colon cancer. So they checked his colon, sure enough, inoperable colon cancer... When it reaches the liver it's to late.
So the only thing they can do is chemo, to try and shrink the cancer in the colon to relieve some of the pain, and to buy him some time. If he was to do nothing at all, they give him six months, with chemo, and if his body doesn't reject it, and EVERYTHING works perfectly, 18 months max... What a kick in the guts.:bash2:
They put a portal in his chest Wednesday, that will receive the chemo, because it's so strong that if it was put in the vein it would burn it out. Plus the shit has to be administered over a 46 hour interval because it's so strong. Every two weeks. BUT he's not eaten in two weeks he's lost nearly 30#, he's weak as a kitten, and his pain is terrible, and this is coming from someone with a high pain tolerance.
So the woman came home from work tonight, called his Dr. and they are heading to Green Bay to meet up with his Dr. to try and get his pain under control, and get some fluids in him. So I hope they keep him there over the weekend at least.
Here a man that worked his ass off all his life doing the only thing he knew how to do, now has this crap to deal with, just makes me sick to my stomach.
I'm sure some of you have dealt with similar situations, but man, it feels like my guts are being ripped out seeing the man I looked up to all my life that was so strong, never sick in this condition.
Sorry for dumping on you all, but being here alone right now makes me think to much, just needed to write something.

Prayers sent for your Dad Buddy. :Pray::Pray:

I've got you in my thoughts.

Remember, there are people to call -and though we're strong, sometimes talking keeps you from hurting yourself much worse.

Todd, we will keep your father in our prayers buddy.

That generation is a tough bunch, worked hard all their life, never took handouts and don't complain. Tom Brokaw once said that they are the greatest generation to walk this planet and I would have to agree with him.

So sorry for your dad
and Family, praying for the best!

Sorry to hear about your dad Todd, we're in a very similar situation here as well. My father in law spent a month and a half in horrible pain before going to the doctor and 2 weeks ago he found out he has cancer in his pancreas, liver and intestines, he didn't want the doctor to tell him how much time he has left but from what I've read it isn't good. All of it is inoperable so he goes next week to have his chemo port put in, hopefully both him and your dad will react positively to the chemo and get some more time to spend with family.

Zippy so sorry to hear about your pops condition. Prayers sent.

Hoping for the best for your father. One good thing is that they can do still do chemotherapy. If it was so far gone they would waste his time. Keep positive man.

So sorry to hear about your dad, Todd. Everyone is in our thoughts and prayers!

Todd,

I know what you mean. That is the worst feeling in the world and the only way to explain is just how you did... feels like somebody is ripping your guts out.

We are all thinking about you and your family.. Prayers will be sent by me daily..

My dad is near 80 and I have to help him do things that he taught me how to do.. it is so hard to see someone that dedicated their whole life to you and someone that you admire and look up to go the other way... and nothing you can do about it...

We are all family here and all behind you and your dad!!

:American Flag 1:

So sorry, my dad had colon cancer a went through months of treatment, chemo and radiation. Had a colon bag for six months. He's doing better now, they caught it at stage 2.
I will keep you, your family and dad in my prayers.

I will keep your Dad in my thoughts and hope that he pulls through this and get well soon!

Got to be tough on all of you. I'll say a prayer for you all. Plenty of ears to bend here so when you need to vent have it.

This place has a great bunch of folks, greatly appreciate everything. Sometimes it feels good to just write down my feelings, and it did help some.
When I came on tonight to see all the posts, I must say you guys are super.:beerchug:
He has stage 4 colon cancer, so that's bout as bad as it get's. (I guess) The Dr. last night is concerned about his loss of time and the weird ways he's talking. So tomorrow they are setting up a MRI of his brain, "thinking" something could be going on in there also.
If that is the case, then they need to think of a different route, or possibly they won't be able to do anything... It's all stuff that's way over my head. Wait and see is all we can do.
Tim, so sorry to hear you're going through the same crap. When will this crap stop already? Enough is enough.:bash2:
Thanks again guys for listening.:beerchug:

Todd:

I am sorry to hear the news about your Dad.

I am hoping for the best outcome that can be had for him.

zippy1
Sorry to hear this.
My Dad was the same way, never went to the Dr.
Only time he would go to the E.R. was when he ripped himself open so bad that duct tape wouldnt fix it.
Prayers for your Dad and the rest of you.

Sorry to hear about your Dad.
Sounds like my Grandfather, never trusted Drs. He said real men don't need a doctor.

Todd,
So sorry to hear about your dad. My grandmother on my moms side got leukemia late in life and there wasn't much they could do. It was hard to be with her and watch her go. I will keep your dad and you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Todd, I'm very sorry to hear about your fathers condition. I wish I had some great words to comfort but I don't. Just know that we are all thinking of you and your family and are here to listen and lean on during this difficult time.

Bill

Prayers for your Dad and the rest of the family too :Pray: :Pray: :Pray: :Pray:

Jeff

Strength to you and your family during this difficult time.

Got yall on the prayer list at church, hoping for the best Todd.

Thanks everyone.
Got to talk with a nurse today to see what they found out on the MRI.
They found three "nodules" on his brain, and a "mass" on his cheek, so it's sounding worst every day now. Tomorrow or Wed. they are going to start chemo I guess, just don't know...
I know for damn sure, this ole boys going to be making himself an appointment for the dreaded colonoscopy pretty soon. Father's brother had the same thing happen to him five year ago, so it's in the bloodline.
I'm afeared things are going to get ugly around here before long.:bash2:

Prayers for your family Todd.. Cherish your dad as our time is very short on this earth.,..

Thanks for the update Todd,

As promised prayers are being sent out daily for you and your family!!

Hang in there and stay strong. My mother once told me something that has hung with me many years... God will never put more on you than you and him together can't handle!

We are all with you!

Thoughts and prayers continued, Todd!

Thanks for the update Todd, sorry to hear things are getting worse. We're all hoping your dad's situation improves, if you ever need to talk just give me a call.

Truly appreciate everything guys. It means a great deal to us.
Change of plan after finding it on his brain, instead of 46 hours of chemo every two weeks, it's now 2-3 hours for three straight days, then again every two weeks. Re-scan in two months to see if there is any improvement, and go from there.
A good friend of fathers stopped in to see me today, and after the hugs and crying stopped, he said this to me. "Seems like every week you hear, did you hear about the guy down the road, or the lady up the road, seems like it's your turn to be the guy down the road this time".
And I guess there is some truth to that, it's always someone that's going through it, but this time it's us.:bigthink:
My biggest problem is being home alone 10 hours out of a day, and living in the home place where I growed up, everywhere I look I remember father doing this that or the other thing. The mind wonders, and emotions run...
He's a tough old bird, so I'm just hoping the chemo will rid him of some of the pain, and he can come home again, even if it's not as long as we'd like.

Oh, my. Just saw this thread. Thoughts and prayers. One day at a time.

Sorry Todd, I just saw this thread. It sounds like they are trying an aggressive approach toward his chemo. Your dad is a strong willed man.....and so is his son (you). The idle time that you have can be havoc on your psyche, reflect on those memories and not only smile because they happened, but stay positive for many more!! Harpo (Adolph) Marx, said in his book (Harpo Speaks), "It's sad when someone passes and even sadder when a great man passes. Its doubly sad when the greatness passes before the man." Sounds like your dad is going to need someone to keep the spirits up and never lose hope for what might be. It's not just the person in our life, but the life in the person that takes our breathe away and forever imprints in our memory.

When my dad was in the hospital with multiple myeloma, another man told me that he had the same thing and the doctors gave him 6 months to live and then he told me that was 11 years ago! Only One Being knows and abides by that timeline.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Cub Cadet 123

Thanks ever so much everyone for the support.
Well tomorrow he goes to the old age home, because they say he's a high risk to fall, and has some memory/ thought issues, well hell I've got that.
Anyway, he "seems" okay with it, but did ask if he get's stronger, can I come home? Yes I told him, but he's got to be able to function alone at times because someone can't be here all the time.
Then the darn nursing home said he wouldn't qualify for the medicare first 100 days, because he's to good of physical condition. They would pay the first 100 days, before we would have to start paying, but I guess he's too healthy to qualify... Did you ever hear such stupidity as that?
He needs 24 hour care, BUT he's to healthy too qualify for the first 100 days.:bash2: Idiots, is all I can say.
I want him home where he would be comfortable, but there's no way we can take care of him every hour of every day. I mean he don't really need anything except someone to walk with him if he needs to get up to go to the head, or from the bed to the chair. But if Nancy's at work what the heck am I going to do if he falls, or gets up in the middle of the night and decides he's going for a walk and falls down and injures himself. All possibilities.
I recall him telling me, he said, "if I ever get to where I need to go to one of these places, take me down in the woods and put a bullet in my head, you wouldn't put your dog through that, and I hope the hell you wouldn't put your father through it."
Makes me feel "real good" doing this to him. Just when you think you've had a crappy day and it couldn't possibly get any worst, don't believe it.
Enough of my whining for one night. Take those that are close to you, and bring them closer, and let them know how much they mean to you, cause it could all change in a new york minute.
Very nice write up there Maxwell, thanks.:beerchug:

Thoughts and prayers continued, Todd!

Think about you every day Todd. Tough to read your posts... Praying for you buddy. :beerchug:

Very well said!!

Todd, I pray daily for strength and guidance for you and your family!!

And will continue to do so!

Take care and thanks for the continuous updates!!

Sorry to hear Todd, prayers sent.

"Makes me feel "real good" doing this to him."

You are doing nothing but taking care of him. You are not "doing this to him", life does this to everyone that lives long enough.
You are a fine son taking care of him and doing what needs to be done, even if it isn't what you would like to do.
We can't always do what we want to do but reality dictates certain actions and I would say that you're doing a very loving thing.
Of course you can't take him to the woods and shoot him, those were just words made long ago, we've all said such things.
Keep up the good work and know that you're doing what needs to be done and doing it with care and love in your heart. What else could one ask for.

God bless, prayers sent.

Nik,

Thanks guys. I just seem to beat myself up over this, seeing it's out of my control, and can't fix it...
But it is a part of life that everyone goes through, and some went through it much earlier than us.
Thanks for listening.:beerchug:

That's what we are here for, Todd. I know how you feel, it got my mom 14 years ago. Cancer doesn't just affect the person that has it.

Well the latest update. Monday Nancy took father to the oncologist, and they tested his blood, and the first dose of chemo really messed with his white blood cells, so had to stop treatment. They told her it would kill him quicker than the cancer.
So today we went to sign him up for hospice, because of the excruciating pain he's having and not being able to eat, and drinking very little over the past couple weeks. They have more "tricks" up their sleeves for keeping him comfortable than the nursing home or their Dr.s.
Trying to keep him as comfortable as possible is my biggest concern/priority at this point, so hospice is the best choice. I don't think there's much time left, but he should make his 77th birthday on the 27th.
He said something today about a 14 year old girl he saw on TV last night from a town here in WI who has an incurable disease, type 2 spinal muscular atrophy. She's in constant pain, and is only 14. He said, "see, like you always say, things could be worst".