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  #1  
Old 05-31-2018, 01:21 AM
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Ozcubowner Ozcubowner is offline
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Location: outskirts of Sydney NSW Australia
Posts: 878
Default Words and how to use them

The beauty of a language and the art of constructing the words of the language significantly lead to their meaning.

This is not a case of twisting, but of the refined manner of presentation by witty minds.

A good case for reference - Lawyers!!!

One evening, after attending the theatre, two gentlemen were walking down the avenue when they observed

a rather well dressed and attractive young lady walking ahead of them. One of them turned to the other and remarked,

"I'd give $250 to spend the night with that woman."
Much to their surprise, the young lady overheard their remark, turned around, and replied, "I'll take you up on that offer."

She had a neat appearance and a pleasant voice, so after bidding his companion good night, the man accompanied

the young lady to her apartment.

The following morning, as he prepared to leave, the man gave her $125. She demanded the rest of the money, stating,

"If you don't give me the other $125 I'll sue you for it." He laughed, saying, "I'd like to see you get it on these grounds."

Within a few days, he was surprised when he received a summons ordering his presence in court as a defendant in a lawsuit.
He hurried to his lawyer and explained the details of the case. His lawyer said, "She can't possibly get a judgment

against you on such grounds, but it will be interesting to see how her case will be presented."

After the usual preliminaries, the lady's lawyer addressed the court as follows:
"Your honour, my client, this lady, is the owner of a piece of property, a garden spot, surrounded by a profuse

growth of shrubbery, which property she agreed to rent to the defendant for a specified length of time for the sum of $250.

The defendant took possession of the property, used it extensively for the purposes for which it was rented, but upon

evacuating the premises, he paid only $125, one-half of the amount agreed upon. The rent was not excessive,

since it is restricted property, and we ask judgment be granted against the defendant to assure payment of the balance."

The defendant's Lawyer was not only surprised but also impressed and amused by the way his opponent had

presented the case. Naturally, his defense was somewhat different from the way he originally planned to present it.

He rose to the occasion!

'Your honor," he said, "My client agrees that the lady has a fine piece of property, that he did rent such property

for a time, and a degree of pleasure was derived from the transaction. However, my client found a well on the

property around which he placed his own stones, sunk a shaft, and erected a pump, all labour performed personally by him.

We claim these improvements to the property were sufficient to offset the unpaid amount, and that the plaintiff was adequately compensated for the rental of said property. We, therefore, ask that judgment not be granted."



The young lady's lawyer answered, "Your honor, my client agrees that the defendant did find a well on her property.

However, had the defendant not known that the well existed, he would never have rented the property. Also, upon

evacuating the premises, the defendant removed the stones, pulled out the shaft, and took the pump with him. In doing so,

he not only dragged the equipment through the shrubbery, but left the hole much larger than it was prior to his occupancy,

making the property much less desirable to others. We, therefore, ask that judgment be granted."

In the Judge's decision, he provided for two options: "Pay the balance $125 to the plaintiff, or have the equipment

detached from its current location and provide it to the plaintiff for damages."

The defendant wrote out a check immediately.
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Old 05-31-2018, 06:39 AM
R Bedell R Bedell is offline
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Lmao.........
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Old 05-31-2018, 08:30 AM
Eugene H. Eugene H. is offline
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Join Date: May 2018
Location: Cragford, Alabama
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That's Funny!
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Cub Cadet is a premium line of outdoor power equipment, established in 1961 as part of International Harvester. During the 1960s, IH initiated an entirely new line of lawn and garden equipment aimed at the owners rural homes with large yards and private gardens. There were a wide variety of Cub Cadet branded and after-market attachments available; including mowers, blades, snow blowers, front loaders, plows, carts, etc. Cub Cadet advertising at that time harped on their thorough testing by "boys - acknowledged by many as the world's worst destructive force!". Cub Cadets became known for their dependability and rugged construction.

MTD Products, Inc. of Cleveland, Ohio purchased the Cub Cadet brand from International Harvester in 1981. Cub Cadet was held as a wholly owned subsidiary for many years following this acquisition, which allowed them to operate independently. Recently, MTD has taken a more aggressive role and integrated Cub Cadet into its other lines of power equipment.

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