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#1
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Tools Explained!
Not mine but really funny.
DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it. WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh sh--!' SKIL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short. PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters. BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs. HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes. VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand. OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race. TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity. HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes , trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper. BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge. TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tension strength of everything you forgot to disconnect. PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads. STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms. PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part. HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short. HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object you are trying to hit. UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.
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Adam Current Workhorses: 1977 1650, Sleeve hitch, #2 tiller; 1985 782, QA 42A snowblower, 50'' deck, 42'' blade, Ags, IH Wheel weights; 197? 1250; 1976 1250, hydraulic lift, 44'' deck, 54'' blade (currently needing a engine) Current Projects: 1970 107, Sleeve hitch, 42'' deck, Tri Ribs, 8'' Brinley Plow Family owns over 30 tractors, 7 combines, 2 bulldozers, 2 mid size trucks, 1 semi, too many truck and scouts to count including parts, and 3 pulling tractors. All vintage IH. |
#2
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LOL! All that is very funny and also so very true least with me! Cool post thanks Adam!
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Brian April 1979 1200 Quietline 44A deck 1988 1211 customized into a 1288 with a K301AQS 38C deck and a 1864 54” deck . Snow blades 42" and 54" . Brinly disk, brinly plow a cultivator and a $5 brinly yard rake! |
#3
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Allen Proud owner of my Original! My Grandpa's Cart Craftsman Lawn Sweeper Craftsman Plug Aerator |
#4
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All I can say is you've never known pain until you've had a sheet.of plywood be ejected from a table saw while you are still behind it...I have ....
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126 in surgery with weights, spring assist, 3 point and sleeve hitch 100 with woods finish mower and rear lift, Nice 125 with super nice sweepster, 1782 Super Diesel, 1650,782D in surgery, 102 parts tractor.. 3 Brinley plows, Brinley cultivators , rear scrape blade, front plows and custom built bedder attachment. |
#5
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Sounds like the usage of tools is a universal thing
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#6
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I like the wire wheel. But realy I dont. About 2 months ago, I was wire wheeling some bolts for the 72 project. I have a bench-top type. Had my safety glasses on so I realy dident think I'd use the full face shield I have. But long story short ~~a dag-gumm wire shot directly up my right nose nostril. Man, that was no joke. Seems to have come out by now.
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IH CUB CADET 1450, 72, 86, 1211, IH #2 CART, IH 56" SNOW BLADE, COLLECTING CUB CADET ENGINES |
#7
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Oldie but very goodie and all are true, ask me how I know LMAO
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2264 with 54 GT deck 1641 AKA Black Jack with a 402-E Haban Sickle bar mower JD317 dump truck BX2670 with FEL |
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Cub Cadet is a premium line of outdoor power equipment, established in 1961 as part of International Harvester. During the 1960s, IH initiated an entirely new line of lawn and garden equipment aimed at the owners rural homes with large yards and private gardens. There were a wide variety of Cub Cadet branded and after-market attachments available; including mowers, blades, snow blowers, front loaders, plows, carts, etc. Cub Cadet advertising at that time harped on their thorough testing by "boys - acknowledged by many as the world's worst destructive force!". Cub Cadets became known for their dependability and rugged construction.
MTD Products, Inc. of Cleveland, Ohio purchased the Cub Cadet brand from International Harvester in 1981. Cub Cadet was held as a wholly owned subsidiary for many years following this acquisition, which allowed them to operate independently. Recently, MTD has taken a more aggressive role and integrated Cub Cadet into its other lines of power equipment.
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